The Sartorial Sleuth - Seersuckers and Sazeracs

Shir o Shekar, the Persian phrase for milk and sugar – say it fast enough, soften up those r’s, throw in a slight drawl, and it starts to phonetically blend into one sweet sounding word, seersucker. Yes seersucker, that ubiquitous southern suit material that makes fat men look slim and tall men look gigantic. Pale blue and white stripes alternate in a soldiered pattern, due north-south, into the classic Deep South attire.

Why, you ask, do southern men insist on wearing this vestige of poverty? Well…it’s a matter of practicality. When the thermometer strains near its upper extent and the hygrometer drips condensate, unable to measure above 100, even the gentlest wool blend will send the heartiest man tilting for conditioned air.  

I worked an assignment in New Orleans years ago, last of July first of August, camped out in the Quarter. The job demanded two weeks of research and interviews in the hottest, most humid city in the country. Now, I love New Orleans, but I did not at the time fully understand the pain that the Crescent City can inflict on a man in a suit in the sweltering, never-ending, afternoons of late summer.

I strolled into a lawyer's office soaked to the bone, embarrassed, and about to pass out. The young receptionist looked up from her Robicheaux novel and eyed me with pity. “Aww sweetie,” she said, “you got on the wrong suit.”

Nobody told me. I was young. Standing there in a puddle of sweat, I sheepishly peeled my dark brown suit coat off to reveal a formerly pale blue shirt, now dark blue, nearly the color of rivers you don’t find in Louisiana.

She offered me—at three o’clock in the afternoon—a mint julep, or an ice-tea. I took both, along with a white terrycloth towel to mop my head and neck. I gulped the tea, gulped the julep, asked for more tea, and downed another julep. It was there in the artificial chill of the one glass tower in New Orleans that I received my first lesson in the sartorial anomalies of the Deep South.

“Don’t wear that suit again.” she said. “Go out this afternoon and pick you up a poplin or a seersucker,” she said. “Do it. Don’t worry bout the sweat, that’s just gonna happen.”

The attorney I was to meet swaggered his way down the hall towards the reception area, mint julep, large mint julep, in hand. He wore the most astonishing assuredness. His white shirt, still damp up the front, across the chest, under the arms, looked somehow crisp. His soft yellow tie was loosed just a bit. But his seersucker pants, that’s what caught my attention, blue and white stripes terminating both top and bottom into mid-tan leather. Fantastic, I thought. Fantastic.

It’s summer in Tennessee again. Cicadas, after thirteen quiet years, have emerged to sing their undulating song. The hygrometer shimmers in a turgid, almost angry way. Clouds boil up, threaten, and then dissipate. The air is, as my grandmother used to say, thick.

I’ve packed my wool for the winter, never wanting to hear that phrase, “you got on the wrong suit,” again. My poplin odd jacket is the go to for the next several months. I’m still looking for that perfect seersucker suit, though.

My plan is to find one by next Wednesday, the first of June. That’s right, the first Wednesday of the month, Patterson House time.  We’ll be sitting on the back porch, cocktails in hand, poplin or seersucker all around. Bow ties are still encouraged, but this month the theme is Seersuckers and Sazeracs. Join us if you can.

[FIND] Vice - Taylor Jackson

Taylor Jackson, Lt. Metro Nashville Police Department, Homicide.

What can we say about Taylor Jackson? She’s tall, blond, gorgeous, smart, well-bred, but rebellious. She’s tough, strong, pretty, leggy, manly, yet feminine. She kills it in a dress and will kick your ass for noticing. Lieutenant Taylor Jackson, the leading lady in a series of detective novels written by Nashville author J.T. Ellison, is unique.

I met Taylor at Patterson House, local gin-joint, dark, tin-ceiling, and bookshelves for walls. We sat at the end of the bar, either side of the corner, facing each other. I ordered my usual, and asked her what’s her poison. She said, “I like beer, maybe a wine. Don’t drink much heavy liquor.”

Thank god James, the friendly barkeep and mix-master picked up on that vestigial Belle Meade drawl. “Young lady,” he said, “trust me on this, you need a cocktail.” He tore a handful of mint, slammed it in a sterling tumbler and twisted the classic julep into a new and delightful taste of old-Nashville.

The Cocktail

by James Hensley, Patterson House

Taylor’s Old-School

2 oz Jack Daniels Tennessee Whiskey (the Nashville connection)

1/4 oz Rothman & Winter Apricot Liqueur 

1/4 oz Demarara Syrup

13 Drops of Peychaud's Bitters

3 Sprigs of Mint

Place the mint in the bottom of a metal julep cup and bruise it. Then, using your muddler, pull the mint up the inside wall of the cup to coat the inside with mint oil. Press the mint back down in the tin and then add the whiskey and stop. Give the spirit a moment to extract still more mint essence from the mint. After ten seconds or so add the rest of the ingredients and fill the cup about 3/4 of the way full with crushed ice. Swizzle the drink until a frosty coat of ice is built on the exterior of the cup. Cap the drink with a heaping dome of crushed ice and garnish with a bouquet of mint and a straw. 

- - -

After enjoying a few too many, we slip out the back door, down the wooden steps to the secret patio behind The Patterson House. We pick a table—there’s nobody else—and settle into seats for a pause. Taylor reaches into her purse and pulls out a cigar. “Guilty pleasure,” she says, clips the end, lights it, and delivers it across the table. Thoughtful lady, that Taylor…

The Cigar

by Joe Zike, UpTowns

CAO – Sopranos Edition

Wrapper: Brazil

Binder: Honduras

Filler: Nicaragua, Dominican Republic, Columbia

A local woman, she knows Nashville's players and fakers. She'd support the homegrown CAO cigar company, and her smoke of choice from the 14 blends they make would be the "Sopranos" edition. This blend has rich cocoa and coffee notes. Her size, fittingly, would be the "Boss" which is 7 inches long with a 56 ring gauge. It's the right cigar for her to blow smoke rings around the shrewdest criminal mind. -JZ

[FIND] VICE

Assignment: Pair a cocktail and a cigar with a fictional PI

Subject: Joe Mannix

Quote: "If you're not gonna pull that trigger immediately, mind if I have a cigarette?" From the episode, "To the Swiftest Death"

Joe Mannix paved the way for all of the TV private eyes we grew up with. He was tough, bull-headed, good-looking, and had a flair for cool cars and fantastic sports coats. We can see traces of Mannix in Rockford (think bright plaid and patterned sports jackets). Magnum took the cool car theme to a whole new level, but it was Mannix who first pulled surveillance in a hey-look-at-me-stand-out-in-a-crowd car.

A Korean War veteran, Mannix knew how to maintain a level head. Whether he was careening down a dirt road in a snazzy convertible or engaged in gun-play with mobsters in ill-fitting, wide-collared, poly-blend suits, Mannix was solid. He’d readily throw a punch, rely on a hunch, and more often than not eschew technology and gadgets for a good old confrontation.

This rough-and-tumble Armenian-American detective was, in short, what every woman in the early seventies wanted, needed. And yet, despite the passel of hot polyester-clad babes that strolled in and out of his life, Mannix, it seemed, was a bachelor’s bachelor, doomed to fly solo. Sharing his most intimate moments with his trusty and (as the website thrillingdetective.com puts it) “oft-kidnapped” secretary Peggy.

Mannix put a modern face on the private eye of the postwar-noir era, bringing the fictional detective into the seventies with a clear nod to the genre. Mike Connors, the actor who brought Mannix to life, once said that somewhere out there "Mannix is still working...There was a decency and a dignity about the man."

Assignment: The Cigar

Operative: Scott Partridge, General Manager

Uptown's Smoke Shop

4001 Hillsboro Road

Nashville, TN 37215

Pairing: After giving the matter a lot of thought, our cigar expert Scott Partridge said, “I would pair him up with a CAO GOLD VINTAGE.” Partridge, general manager of Uptown’s Smoke Shop in Green Hills, argues that the CAO Gold Vintage is possibly one of the best “smooth, medium-bodied cigars” on the market. Like Mannix, the Gold Vintage is dressed to attract, but built tough. Partridge describes the Gold Vintage as having “a silky wrapper that entices with a leathery pre-light nose. Each pull delivers layers of buttery notes backed by a definitive spicy core, attributed to the Habano seed-filler tobaccos from Honduras and Nicaragua.”

Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m on my way over to Uptown’s to pick up my CAO Gold Vintage this afternoon. Maybe, we’ll run into each other. Or maybe I’ll see you, and you’ll never even know I was in the room.

Assignment: The Cocktail

Operative: Josh Habiger, Manager

The Patterson House

1711 Division Street

Nashville, TN 37203

Pairing: Josh Habiger has earned his chef chops in venerable eateries around the world. Prior to taking the reins at The Patterson House, he worked the kitchen at The Fat Duck in London, cooked at Craft in New York, and refined his skills in molecular gastronomy at Alinea in Chicago. He’s a chef, a scholar, and knows his way around a bar. Habiger says, “I believe that Mr. Mannix should be paired with a Rusty Nail cocktail.” He describes the concoction as, “a simple drink containing a blended scotch that is sweetened with just a touch of Drambuie.” Habiger goes on to say that, “Mannix is known for his appreciation of drinking scotch neat, but this little elixir will round out the corners of the whisky and demonstrate the beauty of balance in a cocktail.” Nicely said.

Habiger’s Recipe: Mix 2 oz of your favorite blended scotch with 1/2 oz of Drambuie in a large mixing glass. Stir for about 20 seconds to get the drink cold, then pour into a chilled glass. If you prefer it on the rocks, just build the drink in the glass. Either way, garnish it with a lemon twist and enjoy it while reading your favorite spy novel.

Get yourself to The Patterson House sometime in the next two weeks. We know a guy there, name of Josh. Tell him [FIND] Investigations sent you.

[FIND] Vice

In the next several issues of THE Monthly Ledger, we’ll be running a guest column called [FIND] Vice.

We here at [FIND] Investigations occasionally enjoy our vices. For lead investigator THH, it’s the rare cigar. Investigatrix KDG appreciates the beauty of a fine, hand-crafted cocktail. So we’ve joined forces with two of our favorite local businesses to help us, and you, explore our respective vices with knowledge and artistry.

The Cocktail –

Mission: Pick the perfect cocktail to complement a fictional Private Investigator.

Operative: Josh Habiger, Manager

Venue: The Patterson House

1711 Division Street

Nashville, TN 37203

Tuesday – Sunday 5pm to 3am

615-636-7724

Qualifications: Chef Josh Habiger, an alumnus of Fat Duck in London, Craft in New York City, and Alinea in Chicago, will apply his considerable talents to the task assigned. He’ll be pairing a cocktail with a PI for the next several months. Be sure and sign up for The Monthly Ledger to get the latest in Vice.

The Cigar –

Mission: Choose the perfect cigar to fit the character of a fictional Private Investigator.

Operative: Scott Partridge, General Manager

Venue: Uptowns Smoke Shop

4001 Hillsboro Road

Nashville, TN 37215

Qualifications: Scott Partridge will, with the help of Joe Zike, select a cigar for our PI of the month. Is he qualified? Well, Partridge is manager of one of the World’s Top 12 Tobacconists according to Forbes. Nothing more to say about that…

Drop by any time.